The Juice Maidens - What Sort Of Nonsense...

Sub-carnal inspirations based on "The Juice Man, Power of Juicing"

"Surreal Fruit Extravaganza" by Wheems

(excerpt from “The Book Of Extractions”)

3.       I found myself inside a garden, I saw and look! Maidens with large urns of very fresh dark juice from newly ripened red melon. There were quite a few maidens and their loins sparkled in the sunlight with firmness, also coming were young strong men colored by the sun, bearing sedans laden with enormous fruit, melons and orbs. They, all of them, maiden and young buck alike right there in the clearing took the fruit and ate, and drank the juice of the maidens until no one could continue any further and their energies were depleted.

4.       Then they all rested lying about in the field until the evening hour. I saw them lying there until a horn sounded and all at once they resumed with the merriment and the extracting and oozing and there was fruit flying everywhere. The urns were overturned and each and every one was colored by the juices as they poured the urns into their mouths and faces. They continued in this manner until the sun fled entirely and only the moon acted as light. The moon marked the fullness of their bodies, glistening on their heaving breasts. Then they all left.

5.       I for my part asked if there was any fruit left, but there was none, nor was there any juice and I felt I had been left out a little.

6.       I went out so to find the green and yellow melons and walked until the sunrise to the east of the valley of Slocomb - where what is left of the Dan* lives - and indeed I found my melon and I got the juice from it.  

*Dan of the melon seeds, only three men of the Dan are alive. They have four women but they are not touched since they must retain their seeds. I got their (the women’s) juice also.

If the Gods have explained it to me I have to you also, and yet none of us really know, do we? So stop trying to find out already.

Comments:

Jason: The language shifts in The Book Of Extractions remind me of the Book of Mormon except that it is more of a purposeful shift for the sake of humor. Whereas the Book Of Mormon’s mitten handed imitation of fifteenth century English (found in the King James Version) is just awe inspiringly bad.
Mitt: There are Mormons out there who will kill you, Jason.
Jason: Just kidding! Let Moroni atone me.

Fred: What sort of frivolous nonsense is this? I have come to expect something compelling, thoughtful and darkly humorous (at least mostly). This is just absent minded jabbering tinged with grade school sexual suggestion. Thumbs down, farmer Brown!

Dear Fred: You can't win them all. - ed