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Thursday, March 30, 2017

Armageddon Surprise Party

The Hourglass Of God

You cannot see the sand because he wants it to be a surprise!!!

God is going to fix everything, when he is good and ready!
Hourglass concept: Zzen. Illustration: TMITH. Attitudinal caption: Reynard. Coffee: Sally

Sally: What do you mean "Coffee Sally"! You guys are really pushing it! I'm not taking any more of your crap! I can write rings around you lumbering, pandering, pinheads! I'm not even trying to push some whiny, snot nosed new age agenda. I could draw thousands more viewers just telling it like it is and being. Real being, which is true Zen. Zzen doesn't know what that is and hardly has produced squat since they took away his cash and his customized Bentley.
Reynard: We were only kidding! Come on Sally, don't make us feel bad.
Sally: How does the audience know that? Too many jokes - seemingly aimed at "the girl". What is terribly apparent is that you have no idea how misogynist you are. Why didn't you make a joke targeting Wheems? He's new... Where is Wheems anyway?
Reynard: Here he comes now.
Wheems walks in with apparently - a hooker.
Wheems: Good afternoon, I'm doing an assignment for Phineas, who was quite frightened by the concept of approaching and interviewing a call girl. So he asked me to do it.
Reynard: What did you find out?
Wheems: Nothing. I found you get nothing without cash, that's why I'm here. Is Bob around? I need a hundred dollars for the interview plus a hundred more for  - something else.
Reynard: Bob is gone for the day.
Hooker: So am I!
Wheems: Can I call you?

 Armageddon Surprise Party

Who gets invited when everyone else is getting whacked? In the bible the book of Revelation we read that God has "blood coming up to a horses shoulder" - Jesus! That's a lot of people on the wrong side of the guest list!
At the Armageddon talent show, who gets the hook? I have found that varies quite a lot, depending on whose religion you are referencing. One thing they all agree upon, at least practically*, is bunches and bunches of dead bodies all over the place. So many you can't even bury them and the birds have to come and eat them before the whole planet starts to stink to, high heaven. God's answer to problems is very much akin to the authoritarian fix for societies woes. Kill 'em or let 'em die! Ouch!
     Aside from too many exclamation points up till now, I must say this: God is going to fix this all in his own due time, that is - when he really feels up to it. So don't get all riled up over the Caligula types roaming the earth. God has got you, eventually - sooner or later - more or less. Que sera, sera.

*Some feel "Armageddon" is more like an awakening of spiritual consciousness, in that we die to our stupid irrationality, fear and hate, etc. But you can't control peoples minds by telling them "someday you'll wake up and stop being such an asshole". You need to tell them they will die a thousand deaths and scare the wits out of them. That keeps them in line. Just like when America was great.

Monday, March 27, 2017

How Many Pieces?

Pizza By The Pool

On vacation Deegan saw a family order a pizza by the pool. They left for a moment and he thought this comic up because, he's Deegan...
Words: Deegan, Pencil Rough By TMITH

Wednesday, March 8, 2017

The Silly Rabbit Returns

Wings in The Forest - The Return of Bumpy!

 (Part II of Error-ists In Full Flight) see http://artandwordgrinders.blogspot.com/2017/02/wings-in-forest.html


Sweet!

Institute For American Truth

I was looking for the truth...

They are underfunded, understaffed and the building is in complete disrepair
I was looking for someone, anyone, who keeps track of the facts (or where they may be found) and came across the "Institute For American Truth". They are only open on Tuesdays from 10:30 to Noon. No one there could answer any questions. The manager was deported yesterday, the assistant manager was flying back from Afraidistan and could not get back in the country. Boris Badenov was the only one who would speak to me (between mopping up the leaks all over the place). At the end of our short conversation he said, "If you are asking me my friend, no one can really afford to care. They are too busy not being poisoned, shot or disappeared, do you know?" Do you? I smiled, thanked him, went outside, took the bogus ticket off my car (after photographing the car's location in a completely legal spot) and left. Perhaps I will try and go back one day.

Sincerely Yours
Bob

Wednesday, March 1, 2017

True Lies - Time For A Healing Spirit

click to view larger

Speaking of Souls Slipping Away 

There is a guy I saw near in or around the White house who, by the looks of him, appears to be oozing evil! Wow! The Devil has got his crew in full control and a mind lock on just about every asshole available! Who are these people gleefully doing the dirty work? It is indeed time for a healing spirit!

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

Teaching A Yoga Class - Fond Memory #4

Searching The Vaults


It's the church basement, or lower level. Nicely appointed shiny commercial tile shined and windows that let in a good amount of sunlight.
     I'm lean, about nineteen, charming and engaging - easy. My mom is a yoga teacher - one of the best in the city. She has a class this Saturday at the church but can't make it - so she has me take over for her. I'm supple enough and part trained. Her method of teaching was so smooth and well transitioned, I merely follow what I've seen her do many times and pull it off with no struggle. The students, (mostly women) were happy to see me and I was happy for them as they seem quite satisfied with the class.
     It wasn't until many (forty two?) years later that I realized how much of a master teacher my mother was. She was gone and I took a class with someone else. It was more of a muscle based class with people huffing and puffing, many times straining, nothing like my mothers' class. Mom's class was full of ease and effortlessness while still creating new life in muscles seldom used. You felt invigorated yet relaxed at the end of it.
     I miss her so much.

Monday, February 13, 2017

Grendel's Mother - Daycare

Franchise Opportunity! Pre-School and Daycare

In keeping with the modern day direction toward antagonist alter-ni-tarianism*, Phineas has started a chain of daycare centers for pre-schoolers thru kindergarten. It is named "Grendel's Mother" with the tagline "Bring Your Little Beast To Us". Inside you will find many references to the ancient story ( Sorry movie fans, no pictures of Angelina Jolie) and joyful similarly themed blood 'n guts tales of ancient sword battles and dragons.
It's to Childcare as Jeff Sessions is to Justice

*All rights reserved

If you are looking to alt-invest send us your info and we will see if you qualify!

(The story is "Beowulf" for those of you who are unexposed)